Were you raised by a narcissist? This essential guide will show you how to stop feeling invisible, quiet your critical inner voice, and start living life on your own terms.
Did you grow up with a mother who was controlling or manipulative? Was she emotionally or psychologically abusive toward you? Did she make you feel ashamed, rejected, or "crazy?" Was it all about her, all of the time? When your mother is a narcissist, it can damage and invalidate your sense of self, and leave you with lasting anxiety, insecurity, self-doubt, and a relentlessly critical internal voice. But there are tools you can use to move forward in your adult life with confidence. The evidence-based skills in this book will help you heal the scars of growing up with a self-absorbed and narcissistic mother.
Written by a psychologist and expert in narcissism, Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers offers proven-effective strategies drawn from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) to help you reduce anxiety, build confidence, overcome self-criticism, and live the life you deserve. You'll also find tons of practical tips to help you build healthy, trusting relationships; stop apologizing for the failures of others; and start trusting your own good judgment.
If you were raised by a narcissistic mother and are struggling with the lingering effects of a toxic upbringing, this is the road map you need to heal the past and thrive in the present and future.
Industry Reviews
"Many people navigate adulthood with psychological scars imprinted by their parents. Adult daughters of narcissistic mothers are particularly susceptible to negative feelings about themselves and shame surrounding their relationships with their mothers. Clinical psychologist Kriesberg describes types of narcissism and explains how the narcissists' use of gaslighting and a lack of empathy often leave their daughters feeling alone. They may also have a hard time setting boundaries and tend to live their lives for others. Kriesberg introduces readers to various psychological therapies and exercises designed to help them discover who they are and what they want out of life. Readers are directed to websites where they can access and practice various exercises to develop coping skills. As a result, readers will be able to develop self-confidence and trust in their inner voice. VERDICT: While aimed at daughters of narcissistic mothers, Kriesberg's practical advice is applicable to anyone dealing with challenging parents, not just narcissists. Readers who have already engaged in self-exploration may not learn as much, but this primer will serve as an excellent entry for those beginning to deal with the aftermath of growing up with a narcissistic mother."
--Library Journal-- "Library Journal"
"An intricate and eye-opening dive into maternal narcissism. Through a series of compelling vignettes and applied exercises, Kriesberg provides the perfect road map for understanding, navigating, and overcoming the impacts of being raised by a narcissistic mother. Highly recommend!"
--Jill A. Stoddard, PhD, author of Be Mighty and The Big Book of ACT Metaphors--Jill A. Stoddard, PhD
"Filled with dozens of relatable stories and curative coping tools, Kriesberg's guide is like having a compassionate therapist in your pocket who shows you how to navigate the conflicting feelings of dealing with a self-centered mother so you can confidently set boundaries, honor your own needs, and put yourself back in the center of your own life."
--Courtney Armstrong, LPC, author of Rethinking Trauma Treatment--Courtney Armstrong, LPC
"Stephanie has neatly captured the multitude of ways in which having a narcissistic parent can constrain your own development and cause turmoil in family functioning whilst also acknowledging the different forms of narcissism, each with their unique behavioral repertoires. Narcissists resist change; however, this is an excellent resource for developing skills for dealing with your narcissistic mother--for you and your (future) family."
--Claire M. Hart, PhD, narcissism researcher and associate professor of psychology at the University of Southampton, UK--Claire M. Hart, PhD,
"Stephanie Kriesberg has written a reassuring and easy-to-read book about what it's like to grow up with a mother who is raising you to meet her own needs and is generally incapable of empathy. Kriesberg describes the causes of narcissism in vivid prose. Replete with real-life examples, exercises, and thoughtful journaling questions, I will be sending clients and friends to this book again and again."
--Jonice Webb, PhD, psychologist, and author of Running On Empty and Running On Empty No More--Jonice Webb, PhD,
"Stephanie Kriesberg's book fills an important need for women trying to understand and heal from the myriad issues resulting from being raised by a narcissistic mother. Kriesberg skillfully weaves together a number of treatment modalities to provide practical strategies for coping and recovery. This is a beautifully written and very accessible self-help book. I will definitely recommend it to my clients who come from this kind of background."
--Lorna McKenzie-Pollock, LICSW, director of education for the New England Society of Clinical Hypnosis; with a private practice in Brookline, MA--Lorna McKenzie-Pollock, LICSW
"This is a hands-on, straight-to-the-point, useful guide for processing challenging residual experiences of mothers exposing a narcissistic personality. Facing the range from distant ignorance to intrusive preoccupation--all in the service of the mother's own self-interest--has a major impact on a daughter's continuing internal sense of self. The author connects close descriptions of internal struggle with systematic and thoughtful strategies for daughters' healing and growth."
--Elsa Ronningstam, PhD, associate professor (PT) at Harvard Medical School, and clinical psychologist at McLean Hospital--Elsa Ronningstam, PhD
"Women struggling with the emotional impoverishment and instability of life with a narcissistic mother will find themselves on long-sought solid ground with Stephanie Kriesberg's Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers. Straightforward, reassuring, and interactive, this welcome guide provides an admirable balance of relatable examples, compassionate validation, and proven strategies for healing."
--Julie L. Hall, founder of The Narcissist Family Files, and author of The Narcissist in Your Life--Julie L. Hall