To Love and Be Loved

By: Sam Keen

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Paperback | 15 September 1999 | Edition Number 1

At a Glance

Paperback
256 Pages

Dimensions(cm)
19.05 x 12.7 x 1.37

Paperback

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To Love and Be Loved is a spirited challenge to a culture obsessed with romance and intimacy but dangerously ignorant of the full range of human love. Like a fresh wind, Sam Keen sweeps away tired self-help nostrums and reams of "bad advice from Dr. Lonelyhearts" to reveal a stunningly new map of love in all its forms.

Love is not something we "fall" into, claims Keen, but a complex art combining many skills and talents that take a lifetime to learn fully. At the center of his book are sixteen distinct "elements of love": ranging from attention--a precious gift we can bestow on co-worker, friend, child, and spouse alike--to more exclusive gifts like desire and sexuality. Combining stories, poems and quotes with insights from modern psychology and spiritual tradition, Keen brilliantly explores the elements of memory and solitude in love, the importance of both enjoyment and commitment, and how we can cultivate the essential qualities of empathy and compassion. Each piece ends with suggestions for strengthening our daily practice of the element, so that we constantly enlarge our ability to love in all our relationships.

The final section of the book is a soaring meditation on the claim that "those who love know God," an invitation to experience our place in the universe through the eyes of love.

Industry Reviews

The prolific Keen (Hymns to an Unknown God: Awakening the Spirit in Everyday Life, 1994; Fire in the Belly, 1991; etc.) sets out to explore why we obstinately hide from the knowledge that love (of one's family, one's labors, and of some one significant other) "is the way, the truth, and the life," and to suggest how we may deal with those fears and find the kind of love that makes us feel "rooted" and secure in our lives. Mixing some frank autobiographical recollections with brief aphoristic explorations of love's nature and rewards, and mingling lists of questions for readers intent on analyzing their behavior with specific examples of those haplessly in pursuit of love in all the wrong places, Keen provides a deft review, often insightful (and even moving), flawed by its declamatory style and somewhat confused organization. More shrewdly self-aware than many self-help books, but still too dogmatic, too much of a fix-it manual, to provide a penetrating and original meditation on love. (Kirkus Reviews)

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Becoming a Lover: The Great Art
Love and the Meaning of Life	p. 3
The Elements of Love
Attention: Noticing and Focusing	p. 37
Desire: Erotic Attraction	p. 48
Knowledge: Mindful Love	p. 59
Sensuality: Being in Touch	p. 67
Empathy: The Loving Imagination	p. 78
Compassion: Sympathetic Suffering	p. 90
Enjoyment: Sympathetic Pleasure	p. 103
Care: Responsible Action	p. 112
Storytelling: The Loving Narrative	p. 123
Repenting: Forgiving and Renewal	p. 137
Self-Love: Solitary Communion	p. 154
Commitment: Willing to Love	p. 168
Co-Creation: Fertility and Fruition	p. 186
Adoration: Wondering Love	p. 196
Sexuality: Carnal Love	p. 204
Enhancement: Disillusionment and Renewal	p. 212
Meditation on Faith, Hope, and Love
Love and the Commonwealth of Being	p. 221
Love Alone Its Vigil Keeping	p. 242
Table of Contents provided by Blackwell. All Rights Reserved.

To Love and Be Loved

At a Glance

Paperback

Industry Reviews

Shipping

How to return your order

Defective items

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